Sunday, October 16, 2011

Warning Signs.

Warning Signs to look for.

Characteristics of a Psychopath

  • superficial charm
  • self-centered & self-important
  • need for stimulation & prone to boredom
  • deceptive behavior & lying
  • conning & manipulative
  • little remorse or guilt
  • shallow emotional response
  • callous with a lack of empathy
  • living off others or predatory attitude
  • poor self-control
  • promiscuous sexual behavior
  • early behavioral problems
  • lack of realistic long term goals
  • impulsive lifestyle
  • irresponsible behavior
  • blaming others for their actions
  • short term relationships
  • juvenile delinquency
  • breaking parole or probation
  • varied criminal activity
I would also add, seems to appeal to your sympathy often. Often gives you mixed msgs, Jekyll & Hyde personality.Tries to rush the relationship.  Seems to want to monopolize all of your time. (you'll at first see this as affection for you) - but ultimately it's because psychopaths have no sense of "self" so time alone is purgatory for them.

They do what's called "love bombing" which is basically showering you with affection fairly early in the relationship before those natural feelings should have developed.

Seems hypersexual. They'll also "sex bomb" you. They won't be able to keep their hands off of you. They will want you anywhere, everywhere, every second, in every way you can imagine. This is their way of gaining control over you. The goal is to conquer you in what's called the "idealization" phase so they can then start the devalue phase which is the time when they begin tearing you down from the pedestal they've built for you. The final stage is discard. They're just done. You're old news at the drop of a hat. Or, they have become so cruel and ruthless that you have no choice but to be done with them. This is a clever trick they play. This way the breakup is YOUR idea and when they come back, and they will come back, they can blame the separation on you and appeal to your sense of "sympathy" to get back in your good graces so they can start the whole cycle all over again.

If you're with them long enough and I hope for your sake you are not. You'll begin to sense you're emotions are being toyed with the way a cat toys with a mouse. You'll start to wonder why the relationship is in such a state of chaos and drama all the time. You'll feel like it's your fault even though he/she hasn't overtly told you it is. You FEEL it is. This is a result of the emotional manipulation of chipping away at your sense of yourself.  You may even feel as if your significant other is your enemy even though he/she professes to love you and/or be your best friend.

These are just a few of the warning signs. The most difficult part of being involved with a psychopath is that by the time you're seeing most of these signs you're already bonded with them.  They've figured out how to work you. They know your vulnerabilities and they can make it very difficult to get out of that entanglement. The best thing you can do is get out of the relationship, cut off all means of communication and resist contact of any kind, even indirect contact. Even if he/she is not a clinical psychopath, if they are enough of a question mark that you are considering the possibility it's time to get out regardless if he/she is/isn't, get out. Do what you can to detach any human traits you give this person because psychopaths are not human in the sense that you/I are. They do not have the capability for love, empathy, compassion, or even have a conscience of any kind. Therefor they will keep hurting you as long a it amuses them. They don't see you as human being, so you need to return the favor.

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